The Advantages of Being a Skeptic

There are advantages to being a skeptic. The most commonly cited one is that you don’t have to worry about being abducted by aliens, but there are other advantages that make a skeptical world view appealing.

You don’t have to worry about being crucified, sealed in a tomb, rising three days later having not taken a shower, and upon arriving home find that your house has been burglarized.

You don’t have to worry that when your friends arrive to commiserate that they will give you that what the fuck look, and note that you have been wearing those same clothes now for three days. If you are a skeptic they won’t offer to take you to the Jesus Saves Thrift Store where you can purchase lightly used, and thankfully recently laundered attire.

If you’re a skeptic you don’t have to worry about running into Big Foot on a camping trip or Yeti if you’re in the Himalayas, nor should you worry about being attacked by a giant snake like critter named Nettie.

When you gaze into the sky you won’t have to put your imagination into hyperdrive when you see some object you can’t identify. You’ll go through life unable to identify many things, both in the sky and on the ground and feel okay about it.

And you won’t ever get lost inside the sound stage where the moon landing was filmed, or look for multiple gunmen where there was only one, or join the ranks of the thousands of people keeping the secret of the World Trade Center bombing conspiracy.

You won’t have to sort through thousands of supplements wondering if this time you’ve found the magic pill that will save you from all those nasty diseases discovered by man, granting you immortality in this world or another.

You may however be left out of the more popular groups, the naive and the gullible. You’ll feel a bit like an alien, for there are not many like you.

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